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The ‘Golden Swede’ World Cup Awards 2006

By Mike Martin ⋅ July 10, 2006 ⋅  Print This Post ⋅ Post a comment

Mike Martin presents the awards FIFA couldn’t be bothered with…

‘SEXY FOOTBALL’ AWARD - MOST ENTERTAINING TEAM: Germany

‘NORWAY DIDN’T QUALIFY’ AWARD - LEAST ENTERTAINING TEAM: Poland

‘UNDER-ACHIEVERS’ AWARD - MOST DISAPPOINTING TEAM: England, followed by Czech Republic

‘OVER-ACHIEVERS’ AWARD - RUBBISH TEAM THAT DID WELL: Portugal

‘CLIVE THOMAS’ AWARD - WORST REFEREEING DECISION: Valentin Ivanov, for not sending off Luís Figo for head-butting Mark van Bommel

‘YES MINISTER’ AWARD - WORST INCIDENCE OF FIFA IMPOTENCE: Not suspending Luís Figo for head-butting Mark van Bommel, or Thierry Henry for his dive against Spain.

‘LIVERPOOL IN A CUP FINAL’ AWARD - BEST GAME: Croatia 2 Australia 2

‘ARSENAL IN A CUP FINAL’ AWARD - WORST GAME: (Shared) Mexico 0 Angola 0, Switzerland 0 Ukraine 0

‘HOW DID THEY QUALIFY?’ AWARD - WORST TEAM: Togo, closely followed by Trinidad & Tobago

‘IF ONLY’ AWARD - TEAM THAT WOULD HAVE MADE THE WORLD CUP BETTER: Cameroon, in place of Togo or Angola.

‘PELÉ DOESN’T KNOW EVERYTHING’ AWARD - BEST AFRICAN TEAM: Ghana

‘SCOTLAND’ AWARD - GALLANT FIRST ROUND ELIMINATION: Ivory Coast

‘DYING SWAN’ AWARD - WORST DIVER: Cristiano Ronaldo

‘SCOTTISH GOALKEEPER’ AWARD - OH, COME ON: Zeljko Kalac of Australia

‘RONNIE WHELAN’ AWARD - MOST HILARIOUS OWN GOAL: Christian Zaccardo

‘BURTON ALBION’ AWARD - SHOCK RESULT THAT WASN’T A WIN: Trinidad & Tobago 0 Sweden 0

‘HOME BANKER’ AWARD - GAME THAT WENT WITH THE FORMBOOK: Japan 1 Brazil 4

‘WE’RE MEMBERS HERE, HONEST’ AWARD - TEAM THAT WEREN’T WORLD CUP DEBUTANTS BUT MIGHT HAS WELL HAVE BEEN: Australia

‘MARIO STANIC v WEST HAM, 2000′ AWARD - GREAT GOAL BY AN OTHERWISE RUBBISH PLAYER: Mohamed Kader, Togo v South Korea

‘BETTER THAN IN JAPAN’ AWARD - MOST IMPROVED TEAM SINCE 2002: Saudi Arabia

‘ON THE WANE’ AWARD - MOST WORSENED TEAM SINCE 2002: U.S.A.

‘NOBODY GOES HOME EMPTY HANDED’ AWARD, OR THE SHREWSBURY CUP (WORLD CUP EDITION) - MOST UNINTERESTING TEAM, FOR BETTER OR WORSE: Switzerland

(Mike Martin is a freelance writer and sports journalist. Contact him at mjefm@hotmail.com)

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