Global, Premier League

Step forward the new heroes of European football. Scotland, Cyprus, Macedonia and Northern Ireland, take a bow, lap up the applause, begin gathering the roses from the stage and be sure to catch as many kisses from your adoring public as their newly pursed lips will blow.

The night (and the praise) is yours. Break out the scotch, the Ouzo, the Guinness and whatever alcoholic drink is associated with Macedonia that isn’t nearly as popular there as the stereotype would have you believe, and enjoy.

For the time being at least, these four teams are the pride of their people and, by way of their respective over achievements, have permeated the seemingly impenetrable coat of pessimism their fans have worn all too comfortably over recent years.

The Cypriots had lost their previous five matches against Ireland by an aggregate score of 18-0 before they dished out this 5-2 mauling of Steve Staunton’s men. No one could have predicted the heights they would scale in reversing this trend considering the relative impotence of their striking threat. At least David had a slingshot to fell Goliath.

Scotland managed to beat this summers World Cup finalists France by the odd goal, albeit with a large serving of good fortune. However, Walter Smith will have told his troops that the harder they work the luckier they will get. Their industry over the weekend suggests they have taken him at his word and nine points out of nine in qualification thus far will encourage further such endeavours.

Macedonia and Northern Ireland’s achievements in holding England and Denmark respectively, though slightly less surprising, were still excellent results and both nations will approach round 2 of this international break with added fervour and replenished optimism.

England and Wales on the other hand will both be looking to improve on lackluster performances that will have done much to remind both Steve McClaren and John Toshack that each of them has a lot of work still left to do. Fortunately for all those nations that are left licking wounds after this first round of games there comes, in turn, a second round of games and with it, a shot at redemption.

Not to be outdone, the domestic scene has also been teeming with incident ranging from the sublime to the ridiculous all of it’s own.

As for Pepe Reina, Liverpool fans everywhere could be excused for thinking this is a clear case of déjà vu… again

It appears that three Premiership players have come in for some serious criticism since our last correspondence, namely Javier Mascherano and Carlos Tevez at West Ham and Pepe Reina at Liverpool. Tevez and Mascherano are being blamed in some quarters for West Ham’s recent malaise as The Hammers have failed to win a single game since the arrival of the much-hyped Argentinean youngsters. This is, of course, nothing more than an unhappy coincidence and it is only a matter of time before the team gets back to winning ways. Don’t be surprised to see Tevez in particular enjoying a dish best served cold in an opposition penalty box near you when that day arrives.

Even if the two do yet prove to be better suited to other leagues, the blame for the failings of the entire team must rest precisely there and not at the feet of the new boys. Calls from their international manager, Alfio Basile, for them to jump ship at the earliest opportunity are at best hasty and ill conceived and the pair would do well to ignore such dramatics at this stage of their Premiership careers.

As for Pepe Reina, Liverpool fans everywhere could be excused for thinking this is a clear case of déjà vu… again. For not once has a new goalkeeper enjoyed an exceptional debut season at Anfield only to begin perfecting their best David James impression, but twice in recent memory.

Sander Westerweld preceded Jerzy Dudek in this particular chronology of false dawns. Whether or not Reina can prevent a similar demise will be largely down to his strength of character. He has made mistakes, clearly. Everton’s third of three against him was slapstick enough to have been deemed ‘another fine mess’.

He has, however, also been the victim of some horrendous luck that has compounded both the agony and the scrutiny. West Ham has conspired to beat him twice in two games by connecting with crosses with shins that were meant for boots. Couple this with a horrendous handball decision by a referee’s assistant at Bolton and we begin to see why he is under the microscope. This luck, or there lack of, is what currently separates his cause from that of Dudek and Westerweld. His luck will surely change and when it does he must be ready to seize the opportunities his predecessors failed to. Then and only then can he look long term towards being first choice at Liverpool and setting his supporter’s minds at rest.

Whatever the pressures he faces, Reina would do well not to seek wisdom from Manchester City midfielder Joey Barton who has until midday on Monday to answer to FA Chiefs over his alleged ‘mooning’ of Everton fans at their recent fixture. City spokesman Paul Tyrrell said “Joey wishes to thank the many Evertonians, City supporters and general fans who have contacted the club with messages of support.” – particularly those to whom he exposed his bare arse, one imagines. Those City fans that didn’t complain have presumably been numbed to such images by their teams’ performances this term.

A little further down the M62, Bradford striker Dean Windass has found a direct link between the abuse he receives from opposition fans and his employability “The moment they stop shouting ‘you fat b******’ at me then I will not be doing my job any more.” Congratulations Dean on a bright future in football.

Nottingham Forest manager Colin Calderwood has challenged his team to prove they are not camera-shy having slumped to lowly Accrington Stanley in their last televised performance. “We did not put on the greatest exhibition against Accrington and it would be nice to produce a performance on TV.” says Colin. John Barnes is rumoured to have offered his hand in helping the players appear less wooden in front of camera. Forest, however, is reportedly holding out for a call from Pinnochio.

And lastly, please let us tip our hats to MK Dons boss Martin Allen for his honesty in his assessment of his team’s dismal performance in defeat to Peterborough. “We did OK for 10 minutes, and then it was poor.” Sometimes no more words are needed.

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