The Monday Miscellany

Danny Baker may be back in reasonably regular employment with the BBC but if he ever feels a need for extra work he could always bring out a new ‘Own Goals & Gaffes’ DVD; this week would provide about half the required footage.

Hull City and Manchester City shared gift goals in their 2-2 draw at the KC Stadium yesterday, with Tal Ben Haim and Kamil Zayatte each providing a perfect assist for the opposition’s scorer. But, although hilarious, neither error was the howler of the week.

Heurelho Gomes never seemed to have a reputation for blunders when PSV Eindhoven were playing in the UEFA Champions League but, since joining Tottenham Hotspur, he has dropped clangers to such an extent that most observers now believe Spurs would have been better off keeping Paul Robinson, who has been brought into the England squad in the place of the injured Joe Hart.

Gomes was credited with an own goal by Match of the Day for Fulham’s first on Saturday, although most other sources have generously given the goal to Simon Davies, an ex-Spurs midfielder. The Craven Cottage mistake, committed in front of despairing away supporters, was the worst of his season so far but Gomes has proved a liability almost from the outset.

Rather than list these crimes against goalkeeping, it is perhaps more interesting to examine the alternatives available to Harry Redknapp. César Sánchez, now 37, was signed from Real Zaragoza during the summer after the Spanish side suffered relegation in May. César spent five years at Real Madrid, deputizing for Iker Casillas but did briefly become first choice goalkeeper at the Bernabéu, even managing to get into the starting XI for the 2002 UEFA Champions League final in Glasgow, which Real Madrid won 2-1, although Casillas had to replace him when he was injured midway through the second half.

César came on for Gomes when the Brazilian was injured against Liverpool in their midweek Carling Cup match and kept a clean sheet for the duration of his appearance. His crime appears to be being 37 years old but given his experience and the form of Gomes it is hard to imagine Redknapp not at least considering giving him a game.

Beneath César there is only Ben Alnwick, who will return from a loan spell at Carlisle Utd in the near future. Alnwick has a little Premier League experience, although it was with Sunderland during their disastrous 05/06 season. Redknapp’s most likely approach is to grit his teeth until January before moving heaven and earth to find a replacement; Robert Green is a target given the expected fire sale at West Ham but a loan move for Manchester Utd’s Ben Foster, who is merely waiting for Edwin van der Sar to retire at Old Trafford, might be a more measured response.

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Northampton Town host Leeds Utd this evening in an FA Cup Round 1 replay. Should Leeds win they will visit Histon in a second round tie already confirmed for live coverage on ITV. It would be the first time Leeds have been live on terrestrial television in Britain since 12th December 2002; a UEFA Cup defeat to Málaga, shown on Five. This extraordinary absence of terrestrial TV exposure is perhaps one of the more subtle indicators of the club’s sad decline in recent years, although it is partly down to chance. TV networks like cup ties which involve potential shocks and Leeds simply haven’t been involved in glamour ties since their relegation from the Premier League in 2004.

There are other comparably small clubs who have been on a terrestrial channel more than once in the period since that match against Málaga: Oldham Athletic (three times, against Thurrock, Bolton and Chasetown); Brentford (twice, v Hinckley Utd and Havant & Waterlooville); Huddersfield Town (Accrington Stanley and Worcester City) and, most curiously, Mansfield Town (twice last season alone, against Harrogate Railway and Middlesbrough).

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Who on earth is Baron Mawhinney to criticise Trevor Brooking for raising a perfectly valid concern regarding the coaching of our young footballers? After being a member of the ghastly Major cabinet in the 1990s, his achievements as Chairman of the Football League don’t exactly shout at you, save the pointless and confusing renaming of the lower divisions.

There are many problems at the Football Association but their Director of Football, Sir Trevor Brooking, is not one of them. Somebody who is genuinely passionate about the England national team, Brooking is one of the few people to speak out on the poor, outdated coaching methods which are leaving England short of technically gifted players.

Whilst Brooking’s central point is sound, there is hope. Many clubs have prolific academies; Leeds Utd, Crystal Palace, Southampton, Aston Villa and Manchester City are producing a number of gifted young players. It is pleasing also to note high quality young English talent finally coming through the ranks at the top clubs. Arsenal’s Brit-dominated reserves played Wigan Athletic off the park in the Carling Cup midweek, with 16-year-old left winger Jack Wilshere and striker Jay Simpson shining, Simpson scoring twice. Gavin Hoyte is a promising young right-back and don’t forget Theo Walcott, now a fixture in the first team, is still only 19.

Walcott was ‘made’ by Southampton but Arsène Wenger will make sure that his promise is realized; he will become an intelligent, technically adept player, just the sort that is required in international football. At Old Trafford, local teenager Danny Welbeck broke into a Premier League side for the first time on Saturday, coming on from the bench and scoring a superb long-range goal in the 5-0 win against Stoke City. Chelsea’s youngster Michael Mancienne is already a hit at Wolverhampton Wanderers, with whom he is on loan, and has been promoted from the England Under-21s to the senior side for Wednesday’s friendly in Berlin.

If I may be permitted a moment of smugness on behalf of my ‘other’ team Stockport County, there is also a plethora of young local talent at Edgeley Park, albeit out of necessity as the transfer coffers are usually empty. Last season we gained promotion to League One with a young, attractive side spearheaded by the division’s best striker Liam Dickinson, drafted in from local non-league side Woodley Sports. Last season’s club Young Player of the Year was Tommy Rowe, a left-winger who should play Premier League football one day, though sadly this is unlikely to be with Stockport.

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Wigan Athletic cannot appeal the ridiculous second yellow card shown to Emmerson Boyce at Newcastle on Saturday for a perfectly - and refreshingly - good tackle. This is an effect of Sepp Blatter’s idea that there should be no appeals over bookings as they would ‘undermine the authority of the referee’. Apparently having obviously wrong decisions such as these remain uncorrected does no harm at all to the image of the rules of the game.

Meanwhile, Titus Bramble caused panic among the home side’s defenders at St James’ Park. Plus ça change…

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You may think that this week sees nothing but humdrum international friendlies but you’d be wrong. Setting aside the San Marino v Czech Republic match, the sole competitive game in Europe which should be a formality, there are vital World Cup qualifiers on Wednesday outside of Europe.

In North America, John Barnes’s new charges Jamaica can make the final six-team qualifying league if they beat the already-eliminated Canada in Kingston and Honduras lose at home to Mexico, while in another group Trinidad & Tobago should get the point they need to progress in a home fixture against Cuba.

The Asian qualifiers remain in the balance with the United Arab Emirates the only one of the ten remaining sides with no realistic hope of qualification having suffered home defeats to North Korea and Saudi Arabia and a 4-1 thrashing in South Korea. They host Iran in Group B and the visitors will regard anything short of victory as a disappointment, while North Korea face the Saudis in Pyongyang. The four ‘serious’ teams each have four points but with North Korea having played a game more than the others.

In Group A, Bahrain need a result at home to Australia to kick-start their campaign while a victory for Qatar against an inconsistent Japan side in Doha could put them in a promising position. As Australia have moved continents (in confederation terms, at least) and left Oceania falling off the end of the footballing world, we needn’t worry about New Zealand v Fiji.

If that isn’t enough to satisfy your hunger for international competition, Saturday sees the draw for the 2009 Confederations Cup take place in Johannesburg. The seedings are continental, rather than meritocratic, so hosts South Africa and African champions Egypt take pole position in the two groups. European nations Spain and Italy will be kept apart and whoever gets Brazil will be in the obligatory ‘group of death’.

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Given that an epidemic of injuries on both sides have rendered Wednesday’s Germany v England match little more than a television programme, why not cut losses and field a team of players lost to international football?  (4-4-2) Harper (Newcastle) - Hibbert (Everton), Turner (Hull), Riggott (Middlesbrough), Baines (Everton) - Little (Portsmouth), Ashbee (Hull), Whitehead (Sunderland), Etherington (West Ham) - Windass (Hull), Davies (Bolton).  At least they wouldn’t treat a friendly international as a burden on their time.