The Monday Miscellany

It’s been a strange old tournament in Angola and not just because of the attack on the Togolese team bus on the eve of the tournament.  Though it’s going generally well, with the host side today sealing top spot in Group A, and some decent attendances compared with recent tournaments.

However, those who wish to deride African tournaments will find ammunition in the various organizational blunders which have been made.  For a start, it should not be beyond the wit of CAF to establish who the players actually are.  Mozambique have taken to the field in shirts baring their actual surnames, rather than the Brazil-style nicknames we have all grown used to over the years.  The Egyptians continue to change their spellings every two years; Emad Moteab is METEEB this year, while Mohamed Nagy is suddenly known as GEDO, or perhaps Geddo, or even Gado.  Thank goodness John Paintsil isn’t there.

Then there’s the old favourite, the ‘head-to-head’ rule, as FIFA continue to refuse to force confederations to use goal difference in their continental tournament group stages.  This has today resulted in Algeria being able to contrive a catatonic 0-0 draw with Angola once Mali, who trailed them by two points having lost the head-to-head fixture on Thursday, went 2-0 up inside three minutes against Malawi.

Mali took a 3-1 lead in that match with a few minutes remaining, which meant Algeria took it easy, knowing a draw would suit their opponents as well as themselves.  Twice their goalkeeper, Faouzi Chaouchi, simply stood still with the ball in his penalty area for long spells while no opponent challenged him.

So Algeria, with one goal in three matches and a goal difference of -2, go through and Mali, with seven goals and six against, go out because Algeria beat them.  In a properly organized tournament, Mali would be in the quarter finals on goal difference.  Algeria’s manner of qualification is all the more galling since they were the team who suffered from West Germany and Austria’s Anschluss in the 1982 World Cup.

There have been some great goals: Seydou Keita’s free-kick today for Mali against Malawi; Elvis Kafoteka’s bullet header against Algeria; Siaka Tiéné’s wonderful free-kick for Ivory Coast against Ghana; Ahmed Hassan’s long-range strike for Egypt against Nigeria and Gedo’s spin and volley for the same team against Mozambique.

Blunders have abounded: you may particularly have enjoyed Kennedy Mweene watching Geremi’s hopeful punt from the touchline trickle into the net, or Rigobert Song’s howler which allowed Jacob Mulenga to open the scoring in the same match.  Angola keeper Carlos must take the blame for Mali’s first goal of their opening-day comeback, while Mozambique’s Dario Khan has scored twice, both for the other team.  Wort larks.

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I was, I confess, principally following the Africa Cup of Nations on Saturday tea-time.  So why, at about quarter past six, inbetween matches in Angola, did I suddenly shout, “Hurrah!”?  Why was the peaceful North Yorkshire air suddenly stabbed with a fork in celebration, with more petits pois than is good for our vacuum cleaner scattered liberally across the living room floor?

André Marriner’s decision to award Everton a penalty for shirt-pulling is one of the most encouraging pieces of refereeing seen this season in any European league.  Micah Richards offence was clumsy and more than a little dim, given that Louis Saha was moving away from goal at the time.

We should celebrate for three reasons.  First: the mere fact that a penalty was given for shirt-pulling; almost a monumental incident in itself.  Rejoice.

Secondly: that a linesman, Richard West, gave the decision, flagging wildly the second he saw Richards take hold of Saha’s jersey, in a proactive manner which (almost) means he is worthy of that silly term ‘assistant referee’.  At last a touchline hugger who believes his job consists of more than simply flagging for offside or watching which way the referee awards a throw-in and then signalling accordingly.

Finally, and most importantly: Marriner pointed to the spot without Saha having to go down.  Strikers ‘go down easily’ because they simply do not trust referees to punish offences such as holding, shirt-pulling and so on, unless they see the fouled player go to ground.  I have always believed that, if he has been fouled, an attacker can do what he likes if they deem it necessary to get the free-kick that is rightfully theirs.  But doing so confuses the issue, bringing us into the diving debate, which is a distraction.

Real ‘diving’ is when a player who hasn’t been fouled goes to ground in a manner not commensurate with the nature of the challenge.  This does not happen particularly often in the Premier League.  Players ‘go down easily’ all the time but that is not the same thing.  They are then accused by dullards of ‘diving’, before the usual platitudes about football being a contact sport and a man’s game and blah-di-blah-di-blah.

So let’s have a moritorium on accusations of diving unless it is manifest, such as Siena striker Massimo Maccarone against Milan yesterday, or Alberto Gilardino for Milan against Celtic.  The best anti-diving measure is good refereeing, which punishes cheating by defenders immediately.

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Now, if you will excuse me, I’m off to the Rucking Flanker to watch Newcastle Utd v West Bromwich Albion, the big top-or-at-least-nearly-top-of-the-table Championship clash.  How strange to reflect that, compared with certain Premier League teams, Newcastle’s season has been one of unremarkable stability, benign and enlightened leadership from Chris Hughton and, most disturbingly of all, some half decent football.  Shame on you, Newcastle, we’re all very disappointed in you.